“Happy Monday,” she said. Today, I was supposed to attempt writing a poem in which something that normally unfolds in a set, well-understood, and organized way goes haywire; yet it is described as if it’s all very normal. Define normal?

Non-Compos Mentis*

Open mic Friday night on sixth street, Austin
and the crowd filed in silence.
First up, Gerty Stein wined if she told him
and Pablo painted her time off stage
when BEVO horns in and sings hooray for our side,
just then, Mathew Mac danced to silence
while imitating elon’s ox and Napoleon sang in locomotion.

The crowd cheered with silent finger snaps and the naked king
unzipped his pants
and played his instrument in tune
with united methodist horses chanting bite songs.

Two chickens fried the mic and mooned bleakly,
while the sober addicts ordered salad,
and the dead-beat dads cheered a silent sum.

The police up next went wet with white while swearing they were not watching her over there, and the crowd did the dead bug dong-dance on their backs.

Intermission brought AFD to wet down the APD who forgot their lines in unpaid fines.

And the crowd silently cheered in oxymoronic fight songs.

It rained in the house and the mic said nothing, time after time, and Bukowski’s ghost got booed and everybody left pitifully happy to never have loved at all.

Look both ways because mentality is a subjective call at poetry slams.
Mind the gaps, stutters, and forgotten lines because, funny or not,
silly is just a warm moist feeling.

*The title means “not of sound mind.”